Dining Etiquette

7.2 Dining Etiquette

Unit 1 Basic Dining Etiquette

Hello, my name is Nancy Mitchell and I am the owner of the Etiquette Advocate in Washington DC. My firm provides social and business etiquette and protocol training to corporations, universities, embassies and government agencies. Today we’re going to be talking about, dining etiquette skills and our goal is to make you more comfortable, when you dine for business or pleasure. When you know that your manners measure up, you’ll be able to concentrate on your dining companions and your agenda and not on your silverware. We will be talking today about utensils, glassware, dishes, well be learning how to eat difficult foods. We will talk about the service, how foods come out to you what you do when waiters come to the table. We want you to get ready for primetime. What we will be doing today too is we will be working with a very elaborate place setting and talk about formal meal service. But, you will know that these skills and manners translate to any dining experience you may have in your business or your social life. So let’s begin.

Unit 2 Basic Dining Etiquette - The Invitation(邀请)

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell, I am the owner of the Etiquette Advocate and today we are talking about dining etiquette. Your responsibilities as a guest begin even before you arrive at the event. Your responsibilities begin when you receive an invitation. Look very carefully at the invitation, notice how it’s addressed; is it to you and a guest is it to only you. It’s very rude to respond to an invitation by saying you’re going to bring a guest or to ask question may I bring a guest. Your marching orders if you will are how your invitation is addressed and respond accordingly.

Look at your invitation for clues about the event, the starting time, the dress code. If there is any question about what is the appropriate attire for the event, call, ask questions. If you have any hesitation about how to dress always go one level above what you think will be appropriate. You will always be comfortable, if you are little overdressed, you’ll always be uncomfortable if you are underdressed. Go with the signals that are given on the invitation. It is extremely rude not respond to an invitation. As a guest your primary responsibility is to say yes or no, are you attending? Don’t make your host guess about this, it’s critical for them to know account for the caterer. They need to know a seating arrangement; they need to know exactly how many people are coming. Don’t be rude by not responding to your invitation.

At this point it is your responsibility as a guest to communicate any special needs you may have to your host or hostess. If you have food allergies, you have religious restrictions you have special needs because of disability. When you are invited you need to convey this information to your host. Don’t surprise them the day of the event they sit down at the table with you, they don’t want to know at that point that you are vegetarian they want to know ahead of time. Share your special needs your restrictions with your host or hostess at the point that you are responding to an invitation.

That is how you respond to an invitation and how you prepare to go to an event. Next we are going to be talking about how to arrive at the event and what you do as a guest.

Unit 3: Basic Dining Etiquette - Getting Seated

 Hi, I am Nancy Mitchell, with the Etiquette Advocate and today we are talking about dining etiquette. We are going to get you ready to attend an event. You have arrived at the event, what do you do? I am going to walk you through some of the steps that will help you to be comfortable when you arrive. Never, never skip the check-in process, there is a registration table, there is a process, people have set something up for you, they want you to participate in the check-in. Go to the registration table; pick up a name tag, always wear name tag high and on the right side. The reasoning behind that is, when you shake hands with somebody and you are meeting, greeting, you want to reach out, you want to be able to have your eye go right up their arm, catch their name high and on the right side and then go right to their face and make eye contact. That’s the way that you connect with someone, so remember, a name tag is high in on the right side, if you skip that registration process, you are not going to have that name tag.

Another thing that you are going to be receiving, when you are checking in is your table assignment. Since, we are talking about dining etiquette today there is probably a seating arrangement. If you decide that there is a long line at that registration table and you are going to kind of walk around it and go to the bar, do whatever you want to do, you are going to miss this whole procedure. You will see an envelope that has your name on it, it will tell you exactly, what table you are seated at, don’t skip this process. When the cocktail period is over, the bell is rung; you will not know where to go to sit down. Play by the rules, be a team player, go through the registration process. Let say the cocktail period is over, it’s time to move into the tables. You now know are assigned table 22, you move toward 22, you find a place card; there will be a place card at your table. You find your seat and you are going to stand behind your chair. The reason why we do this is, you want to have the opportunity to meet and greet as many people as you can at your table before sitting down. So, I’ll stand behind my chair, when others join me at table, I will extend my hand and introduce myself to someone on my left and to my right and I will wait until there are four or five people at my table before I sit down.

Once I have sat down, I want to make sure that I talk to people on my left and my right. It is a very rude to talk only to the person you have come with to the event and to ignore other people at the table. Gentlemen, if you are attending a social event, it is good manners to pull the chair out for the woman to your right, help her to get into her seat. If you notice that the woman on your left is having trouble or there is no one assisting her with her chair, do the same there. In business settings, that is not required, everyone seats themselves. When you do take your place at the table, please do not place any personal items on the table, you don’t place a cell phone, a blackberry, a portfolio, a handbag. You take your seat and all of your personal belongings go under the chair. These are tips about what to do before you sit down, next we will be talking about what are some of the dos and don’t dos when you have taken your seat.

Unit 4: Basic Dining Etiquette - Table Taboos

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell owner of the Etiquette Advocate and today we are talking about dining etiquette. We will now talk about what are some of the things you do not want to do, when you are seated at dining room table. First and foremost when you arrive at the table and you have found your place it is extremely rude to change place cards. The host hostess has worked very, very hard on finding an arrangement at the table that will facilitate conversation. There is mixing and mingling of people and corporations and agendas, don’t make the mistake of moving a place card. Find your place and sit where you are assigned, other things not to do at the table are taking medications. It makes other people very uncomfortable to see you taking a medication even you need to do that before a meal, it should be very, very unobtrusive. It should be something that you do not do when other people are watching.

Hygiene, don’t assume that after a meal you can apply lipstick. You cannot use a toothpick at table you cannot use your finger to get something out of your teeth at the table. All of those things are very offensive and will disturb other diners.

Using your cell phone, the cell phone should be under the table it can be in a briefcase, it can be in a handbag. If it rings, reach down, turn it off, say to your dining companions I am so sorry, I had thought I had turned that off. Don’t look at the display, don’t answer the call to say I am sorry I can’t talk right now or I will call you back. You are saying to your dining companions, that whoever is calling you is more important than they are, this should be out of the picture.

Other things to remember are it is your responsibility to talk to your guest on your left and your right. If you’ve come to the event with someone from your business, from your family, it’s your responsibility to talk to other people at the table and not just to the person with whom you’ve come. Other things to avoid are, taking away doggy bags, if you’re at business event or any event where you care about your image, don’t ask for doggy bags, don’t share bites of your food with other people at the table, don’t ask for taste of someone else’s. These things reflect very poorly on you. Next we are going to be talking about how to navigate the place setting.

Unit 5: Basic Dining Etiquette - The Place Setting

 Hello, my name is Nancy Mitchell and I am with the Etiquette Advocate. Today, we are talking about dining etiquette.

I am going to show you a place setting today and help you to navigate the place setting. Today, you will see a very elaborate place setting, which may not always be the case when you dine for business or pleasure. But, this will help you to be comfortable when you are in a situation, where utensils are placed in a certain way and you need to know how to use them.

Sit down, look at the place setting; you’ll pick up cues about what the meal is going to be. Utensils for instance, are set in the order that they will be used, from the outside in, toward your service plate. The same is with glassware. Glassware is set in the order that it will be used. Use those cues to know what to expect in a dining situation. Let’s look first at the utensils. As I mentioned, this is a very elaborate setting, you will not always see this, when you go to dine in a restaurant, obviously you will be given the utensils that you need. As you order specific courses, other utensils will arrive. When you dine in someone’s home, you may not see as many pieces of utensils, but today we are showing you everything that you may encounter.

Knives and spoons are going to be set to the right of the plate. Forks are going to be set to the left. Let’s start to the right of the plate. The small fork that’s set in the bowl of the soup spoon, tells you there will be a seafood cocktail. Next, is going to be a soup, because there is a soup spoon. The next spoon that you see is going to be for coffee or tea. The next knife you see is going to be for a fish course. The next knife is going to be for salad course because in the United States we serve a salad before the entree is served. The next knife and the final knife closest to your plate will be for your entree, your main course.

Looking out to the left, forks are also set in the order that they will be used. The fork on the outside is the fish fork, for the fish course. Next, will be your salad fork followed by the main course or the entree fork. So, when you sit down, take a look at your place setting, pick up some cues from how it set. Silverware that’s set above the place setting is for dessert. You will never be worried about whether or not to use that for salad or soup. If it’s above the place setting, it’s for dessert. Leave it there until the end of the meal. Later when we talk about the dessert course, well tell you how to move those into place.

There is a code about your place setting. If you remember the letters BMW, you will always know where your place setting begins and where it ends. When you are seated at a very, very crowded dining room table, often you don’t know if your bread plate is on your left or your right. If you remember the letters BMW as we read them left to right, think about superimposing the letter B over your bread plate, M for main course or the middle of your place setting and W for wine, water or the W in glassware, you will never use the wrong bread plate. BMW is a guide to your place setting.

Next, well talk about the napkin, how to use it and where to place it.

Unit 6 Basic Dining Etiquette - The Napkin

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and today, we are talking about dining etiquette.

I would like to talk with you today about using a napkin and how to place it, while you are dining. The very first thing you do when you take your seat at a dining table is, think about your napkin. In many case, your place card may be placed in the center of your napkin, if that’s the case, place it up here above the silverware which is for dessert.

Then look to your hostess, if you are dining in a private home, wait for your host or your hostess to take his or her napkin from the table before taking yours. If you are dining for business or in a restaurant setting, take your napkin immediately when you sit down. Today, we are using a very large dinner napkin and normally everything you see me do now would happen below the level of the table, but I am going to use this a little higher, so that you can see what I am doing. I am going to unfold the napkin in half and until it's in half, and I am going to place it on my lap with the fold up to my waist. All of that needs to happen below the level of the table, so you are not flapping the napkin out here in midair. There are certain things you will and will not do with a napkin. It has one purpose and one purpose only and that is to blot your mouth between bites, between courses, when you feel that there is something on the outside of your mouth. It is not meant to touch your face in any other way it never touches your nose. It never helps you, if you’ve had very hot sauce or whatever is going on with a very spicy meal. It is only meant to blot your mouth, it returns immediately to your waist. A napkin is not used to clean the silverware that may have spots on it. It's not meant to dust your chair, if you see crumbs on your chair, it is only meant to blot your mouth. It has one, one duty if you will, and one duty alone to blot your mouth.

You will hear us talk later about something called the Silence Service Code, that is a code where you are sending cues to the wait staff about where you are in the process of your meal. The napkin plays into that silent service code, when I am leaving the table temporarily for a telephone call, to visit the rest room; I am going to get up and I am going to put the napkin on the seat of my chair. It tells the wait staff that I am coming back please don’t take my course away. When I am completely finished with my dinner, I will fold my napkin in loose folds and I will place it to the left side of my place setting. This sends the message that I am completely finished with my meal, I won’t be coming back and you can take away my place setting and that’s the Silent Service Code, in relationship to the napkin. Next, we are going to be talking about how to use utensils.

Unit 7 Basic Dining Etiquette - Using Utensils (餐具用法)

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dinning etiquette. We are going to talk now about the placement and the use of utensils. Utensils are set in the order that they will be used according to the courses that are on the menu. Going from the outside in towards your main service plate, spoons and knives are on the right, forks are on the left. This place setting would tell me that my first course is going to be soup and this is the grip that I would use on spoon. A spoon is held like a pencil. We will talk in a minute about eating a soup course. There are two grips to remember about using a knife. A knife can be used as a cutting implement, where your index finger is placed on the joint between the handle of the knife and the blade of the knife and it is used to cut something like meat, the entree vegetable. A fish fork is the only exception to that rule, if there is a fish knife in your place setting, that knife is held like a pencil. That grip is to ensure that you will be able to remove bones, skin whatever is part of your fish course. There are two styles of dining. There is the American style of dining and the European style of dining. The United States is probably the only culture in the world where we switch our fork and knife after we have made a cut and we are trying to eat the food that we have cut. To demonstrate in the United States, we will hold our knife and fork in this fashion, pivot our wrists, make the cut, place our knife to the top of our plate, switch the fork to our right hand, if you are right handed and take the bite that we have just cut and we do this switching back and forth many, many times throughout a meal. European dining means that you are using the same grip for the utensils. You have made the one cut, one cut at a time, but you leave the knife in your right hand, you pivot your left hand the food comes to your mouth, your wrist are resting on the edge of the table. You do not need to put your knife and fork down between bites. The only time you do put them down is when you are going to take a drink of a beverage or you are going to have a bite of your bread. Let’s talk for a minute about something called the Silence Service Code. If you are dining American fashion or European fashion there are messages that you can sent to the wait staff that let them know where you are in the progress of your meal. If I am dining American fashion, I am going to be cutting one bite at a time, when I need to take a break to take a beverage or to leave the table for some reason I am going to place my knife and fork in such a way that there is a space between them, they are on the right side of my plate. I am sending a message to the wait staff that I am not finished with this course, please don’t clear it away. If I am dining American fashion and I am completely finished. I am going to line my knife and my fork up on my plate, in what is called the 10-20 position. If you envision your plate as the face of a clock, the tines of the fork and the point of the knife are going to be pointing to 10 o’clock on the face of the clock, the handles are pointing to 20 past the hour on the clock. They are parallel, they are close together, they are sending this message to the wait staff, I am completely finished with this course you may clear it. Now, let’s talk briefly about the European style of dining. Again the grip on the silverware is the same, but the difference is, I am not going to be putting my knife down and switching my fork back to my right hand between each and every bite. I am going to be making that cut, I am going to be pivoting, my left hand to bring that bite to my mouth, I have my elbows very close to my body, I have my wrists resting on the edge of the table and I continue in this fashion until I need to take a sip of a beverage or I leave the table for some reason. At that point I am dining European style, I am going to crisscross, my knife and my fork to send again this silence service code to the wait staff that I am not finished with this course, please don’t clear it away. When I am completely finished after having dined in the European fashion, again I will use this 10-20 position on the clock if you will and I will lay my knife and my fork parallel in that position with the tines of the fork down. This indicates that I have been dining in the continental fashion. We will next talk about glassware.

Unit 8 )Basic Dining Etiquette - The Glass Ware（酒杯用法）

 Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette.

We are going to talk now about glassware, the placement and the use of the glasses that you will find at your place setting. Glasses are at the right of your place setting and they are arranged in the order that you will be using them. White wine is the glass that is closest to your plate. It's assumed that, that’s the beverage that you will be having with an appetizer or your first course. Red wine is the glass directly behind that and it's a larger bowl as you see. A water glass is an even large goblet that’s going to be behind those two glasses and there may or may not be a champagne flute which is at the back of the arrangement and champagne is normally served with the dessert. When you have stemware, it's a good idea to pick the glass up by the stem. That goes for a white wine or a red wine, wine experts will tell you that picking up a red wine by the bowl of the glass, is going to change the temperature of the wine and therefore the flavor. So, it's a good rule of thumb to grasp the wine glass by the stem in each case. That may not be possible with a water goblet because it's a very heavy glass, it's a bigger bowl, it can be top-heavy. The grip you will want is to grasp the bottom of the bowl the top of the stem, with enough fingers to make is secure. It can be very large, it can be very heavy. Some things you are not going to do with your glassware, if I did not want a beverage, I am not going to turn my glass over to indicate, I don’t want this course, or this white wine. When the waiter comes around, I will pass my hand over the top of the glass and I will say, No, thank you. I don’t care for that wine.

Other things you are not going to go, if you want to call attention, to a toast or you are trying to get the attention of the other diners, you are not going to use the utensil to clink the side of your glass. That’s not what they are there for.

The next thing, were going to talk about is bread and condiments and how to pass them and where to place them.

Unit 9 )Basic Dining Etiquette - The Bread and Condiments （面包和调味品）

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are taking about dining etiquette. We are going to talk now about bread, butter and other condiments. Bread can be served in two ways, it can come as an individual roll that’s on your bread plate to the left of your place setting or it can come in a breadbasket. If you are served an individual roll and it’s on your plate, the best practice is to break one piece of the bread at a time, break that very close and low to the bread plate and butter one piece at a time in eat one piece at a time. What you would not do is break the roll in half, butter half of the roll and take a bite out of half of that roll. So, one piece at a time, butter one piece at a time. Butter comes to you in a shared dish in most cases, you would take butter from the shared dish, you would place it on your bread plate with your butter spreader and you would pass the butter to the next person to your right. Then you would take your butter spreader, you put the butter on that one bite that you have broken and eat that one bite. If this is not the case, there isn’t an individual roll placed on your plate, there may be a breadbasket. It’s your responsibility, if you were the closest person to the breadbasket to start the bread around the table. You pick up the basket, even if you are not having bread yourself, you pick up the basket, you would notice the things that are around you and say, that’s my job, get that started, pass that to the right to the next person would you care for some bread?

Same thing with other condiments, if you have the salad dressing, you have other things that are shared by the diners at the table, even if you are not using those condiments, get them started, pick up the salad dressing, pass it to the guest on your right. Salt and pepper is an exception to that rule, wait until someone asks for it. If it close to you, they may turn to you and say, would you pass the salt? If they say that pass the salt, you pass salt and pepper together, they are never separated. You try to put those down, next to the person, next to you; don’t place them in their hand. Put it next to them and it will avoid any spills or dropping them. Traditionally, salt was served in something called a saltcellar. These were placed at various points around the table and may or may not have a small glass spoon. If this is the case, when you say pass the salt, you will get only the salt and you use the spoon to sprinkle it wherever it’s needed. If individual saltcellars are offered, they will be in front of each guest, may not be with the spoon, you pick up your saltcellar you use the point of the clean knife to take a bit of salt from the cellar, sprinkle it where you want on the plate, put the saltcellar down. Remember also then once that knife is used, if a knife is used any utensil is used, it must go back on to plate not back on to the table cloth. So, think about other people do they need the condiments that around you and be a good neighbor, get things started and pass to the right. Next we are going to taking about the soup course.

Unit 10 Basic Dining Etiquette - The Soup Course （喝汤礼仪）

 Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette. We’ll talk now about the soup course and how to eat soup. Soup can be served in a number of ways, what we are starting to show you right now is soup served in a soup plate. It’s a very shallow bowl and it will be placed on top of a charger or a service plate, which was already at your plate setting. Think about your soup bowl as the face of the clock and you are going to be dipping soup from 12 o’clock on the face of that clock. The outermost spoon is going to be your soup spoon and as you see it’s a utensil with a larger bowl, you’ll know it’s the soup spoon because it’s to the far right side. Remember anything above your place setting is for desert, so you are not inclined to pick up that desert spoon thinking that might be the first course. Soup spoon on the outside on the right, I am going to dip soup from 12 o’clock in my plate, I will take the soup spoon across the edge of the plate, get any spills off the bottom of the soup spoon and then the soup comes up to me. I am going to drink this soup from the edge of the spoon that faces me, not from the point of the spoon. So, again dip at 12 o’clock, get spills off the bottom of the spoon by dragging it across the rim of the bowl, bring it to your mouth, sip it from the edge. Between bites when you are using a soup plate, you may leave your soup spoon in the soup plate, because its shallow. It’s not going to cause any spills or any problems.

Now, I would like to say make sure you have positioned yourself at the tables, so that you will be successful with eating soup or any meal if you will. Use about two widths of your hand if you will to measure between the edge of the table and your stomach. That’s about the distance that you want to be when you are seated at the table so that, that food is not traveling so far from a plate to your mouth. Eating soup is as I mentioned, the soup coming to you not you going down to the soup. You want to maintain fairly straight spine, you can lean over slightly, you are not going to hunch over, you are not going to rest your arms on the table and shovel the soup into your mouth. Sit up straight, one small bite at a time, don’t fill the soup spoon, so that you are going to have trouble drinking all of that soup or that it is going to spill while you are doing so. Bring it to your mouth sip it from that side, that faces you. Take a drink leave your spoon in there, you are finished the spoon stays in the soup plate.

The soup may be served in a soup cup or soup bowl, and if that’s the case it’s going to arrive on a liner. After you’ve had some of the soup eating that in the same way from the bowl or the cup, always place your soup spoon on the liner, the saucer that’s come with that. Smaller bowls, you don’t leave the soup spoon in the smaller bowl in that manner, either between bites or when you are finished, always placed on the liner. Next we are going to be talking about the salad course.

Unit 11 )Basic Dining Etiquette - The Salad Course （吃沙拉的礼仪）

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette. We are going to talk now about the salad course and how to eat salad.

Normally in the United States salad will come between the appetizer and before the main course. If you are traveling in Europe or other foreign countries, the salad course may follow the main course. Today we are placing it before the main course. Your silverware is set in that fashion, you’ll see that your salad fork is to the outside now, you have lost some of the silverware as we have progress through the courses. You will pick up the fork that’s on the outside, slightly smaller than the entree fork. You will pick up the knife that’s on the outside. Those are going to be your utensils for the salad course.

With salad you have the option of eating it with fork alone or knife and fork. If you chose to eat salad with fork only you can use the side of the fork to cut different bits of the salad and put them into your mouth, whether you are left handed or right handed. If you choose to use the salad fork and the knife, then you will have that choice of American style of dining or European style of dining, with how you use the utensils. If we are using American style, we will cut one bite of the salad, we will place the knife to the top of our plate. We will switch the fork to our right hand and we will eat the bite that we have just cut and time after time we are going to do that as we cut and eat each bite. If we have chosen to eat in the European fashion, we are going to make that first cut, we are going to use our knife to push other bits of lettuce or cucumber or carrot in this case to make a nice little bite on the end of this fork, keep our elbows closed, rest our wrists on the edge of the table, pivot this hand bring the food to your mouth with the fork not switching the knife and fork from hand to hand. This is called the European style.

We can do this make several cuts, chew, may be talk to the neighbor at the table, make another cut, another bite, then when we are going to have to rest, we talk about the Silence Service Code, European fashion, our utensils will be crisscross in this manner, we take a drink of our wine, a sip of our water, bite of our bread, we go back to eating.

When we are completely finished, if we have been eating American fashion, we will get as close to the 10-20 position on the face of our clock, if you will. We will line these things are parallel, we will have the tines of the fork up for American style of dining, we will have the tines of the fork down, if we have been eating European fashion.

Think of the face of your plate as the face of the clock. Again this is 10 o’clock, this is 20 past the hour, that’s how you are going to line up your utensils for the salad. If you have finished your salad course and let’s say you have only eaten it with a fork, but you are given a knife for salad at that point you need to put your knife on your plate, say I am finished in this completed fashion, waiter will come and take your salad plate and utensils away. So, even if you haven’t used that salad knife at this point you need to put that on the salad plate and have it cleared away. Next we are going to be talking about the main course.

Unit 12:  Basic Dining Etiquette - The Main Course （吃主菜的礼仪）

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette. We’ll talk now about the main course and what to do when that arrives. In most cases you will receive your entree as a pre-plated course. Whatever you have ordered, if it’s in the restaurant or whatever your host or hostess has planned for you will come pre-plated and the waiter will set down a plate in front of you. By the way wait staff will serve you from the left, they clear from the right.

Glassware is always filled and removed from the right side, you need to be aware of where waiter is in the service of a meal, because there are times when you might have to lean to the left or to the right or to accommodate a waiter in some fashion. So, if your entree arrives in this manner, you again have that option of eating American fashion or European fashion. If I have chosen to eat American fashion and we are having today mashed potatoes, chicken and green beans. I will make one cut of meat at a time, I do not cut the entire chicken breast, I cut one piece at a time and I eat one piece at a time.

American fashion, I am going to make that one cut, I am going to place my knife on the upper edge of my plate, I am going to switch the fork to my right hand and I am going to eat the bite that I have just cut and I will go through that many, many times as I eat the entree. If I have chosen to eat European fashion, I am going to make that cut, move the fork to my mouth without changing it from hand to hand have my elbows very close to my body, my wrists can rest on the table and I can make as my cuts in this fashion as I want without putting my knife and fork back on to my plate. When it’s time for me to take a sip of water, a sip of wine, I will follow again that Silence Service Code, where for European fashion, my fork and knife are crisscrossed a X pattern on my plate, take a drink of water, leave the table for a short period of time or if I am eating American fashion again they will be crisscrossed, but the tines of my fork will be pointed up. Some space between the utensils, it’s telling the wait staff, I am not finished, don’t remove this course, I am coming back. When I am completely finished those are going to be parallel, closer together, European fashion the tines will be turned down and again these will be close together and parallel on this portion of the plate. The beauty of eating continental fashion is you can make that one cut, but then you can push some potatoes on to this bite, you can push a few green beans, you can build a little package of food, if you will on the end of the fork, pivot your wrist bring that to your mouth, it’s perfectly alright to use the knife as a pusher, it pushes bits of the potato, bits of the green bean, whatever you want to make this bite. You can push that on to the end of the fork and bite it at one time very efficient. The rule of thumb and this is served is taste your food before you immediately add salt and pepper, its shows that you are jumping to conclusions, you are a rash sort of person, you are often offending your host or hostess if you reach for the salt and pepper and you immediately salt and pepper your food, before you have even tasted it. So, go easy on the salt and pepper taste it, enjoy it, then decide if it needs something else. You can now look for condiments on the table, but if you are in someone’s home, don’t ask for special sauces that you don’t see that are on the table and meant to be served with the dishes that are planned for you. Next we are going to be talking about French services with a main course. Now that we have showing you how to eat a main course that is pre-plated. I would like to share some information with you about French service. On very formal occasions, your host or hostess may determine that the entree or any other course may be served French service which means, that the course will arrive on a large tray and the wait staff will offer the food to each diner. This tray will contain the food for the entire table. So, the diner needs to watch to see what is happening. When the waiter comes to the left of the diner, the diner may need to stop talking, look at the waiter and indicate which of the dishes or food items on the tray they wish to have. You could turn to a waiter and you might say in this case, I would like some of the chicken breast and the green beans please, but I don’t care for the potatoes. You will have to communicate with the waiter to let him or her know, what you want from the tray then the waiter will literally serve you what you have just asked for in a proportion on your plate and if you want a little bit more, you might say May I have a little bit more of the green bean or little bit more the sauce or something. So, you need to communicate with the waiter.

Modified French Service will be the food for the entire table is arranged on this tray, but the serving utensils will be pointed toward the diner. The waiter will ask you to help yourself, you in that case pickup the fork in the spoon and you lift the pieces of the food that you want from the common tray on to your plate, then the waiter will move around the table in such manner. Next we are going to be talking about how to use a finger bowl.

Unit 13 Basic Dining Etiquette - Using a Finger Bowl（洗手的礼仪）

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette. I would like to tell you now about how to use a finger bowl. A finger bowl is traditionally served after the main course and before the dessert. The thought is that you may have had a course that involved picking something up with your hands, there may be grease on your hands. In some way, you want to clean your hands very quickly and get ready for dessert. It’s also a ritual if you will it’s something that’s been around for many, many, many generations. So, it may seem that it’s very archaic, but it’s part of a traditional dinner service.

What will happen is a waiter will bring you a plate, on top of the plate is a doily. On top of the doily is a small bowl that is maybe half filled with water and inside there may be a lemon slice or there may be a flower floating. Those are for decoration, you don’t have to remove the lemon, you don’t remove the flower, those stay in the water. You dip one hand at a time and we are talking very, very quickly, very unobtrusively you are switching the fingertips of your hand in the water. You are moving your hand down to your lap where your napkin is placed you are drying the tips of your finger. What you can’t see below the level of the table is I am drying my fingertips on the napkin that’s lying on my lap.

I have done one hand I do the other hand, so it’s one hand at a time. I am drying my fingertips now, once that’s finished. I pick up both the doily and the bowl with the water and I place them to the left and above my plate where my bread plate was before it was cleared away. This then becomes my dessert plate. I need to clear the doily away, so that whatever is coming next for dessert will sit on the plate and not on the doily. At that point, I will notice that I still have silverware here above my place setting its for dessert. My job as the diner is I pick up the spoon and the fork and place them to the left and the right of my plate setting. Just as before, forks on the left, spoons on the right. Those become my utensils for dessert. The doily and the bowl of water remain here, up to the left of your place setting until the waiter comes to take that away. Next, we will be talking about dessert and coffee.

Unit 14 Basic Dining Etiquette - The Dessert and Coffee（吃甜点的礼仪）

 Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with The Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette. We are now going to focus on dessert. Dessert has been served; it comes with coffee or tea. How do we proceed? We earlier moved our dessert utensils from above our place setting to the left and the right of our place setting. We now have the option of using two utensils for dessert. Traditionally that’s what was done. The fork was used in the left hand as an anchor if you will, to hold various foods or items in the dessert service in place while the spoon would scoop each bite. This is something that you still can do. If you choose to only use fork or spoon that’s alright as well.

If you have something like cheese cake, pie, other kinds of cake you may just need the fork that’s perfectly alright. Between bites, the fork stays on the plate as we mentioned throughout the tutorial, utensils cannot go back on to the table or the tablecloth after they’ve been used. So, between bites, I would place the fork on my plate. If have chosen to use two utensils while I am eating the dessert, both of these would be on the plate between bites or when I finished. Coffee then will be offered at that point by the wait staff. If you don’t want coffee or tea, you do not want to turn your cup upside down to indicate you don’t want that beverage, just pass your hand over the top of the cup and look, speak to the waiter and say, No thank you, when they come around to serve coffee or tea.

If you want cream or sugar, ask the person who is closest to those set of condiments to pass them to you please. Even they are near you, even if you are not using cream or sugar, you should start these around the table, obviously someone at your table is going to require cream or sugar. So, you would start the sugar bowl in this fashion, passing to the right and the cream in this fashion, any condiment or serving piece that has a handle, the handle should be pointed toward the person who is receiving it as you pass it to them, make it easy for them to grasp it. So, you may have to pick it up in this fashion, turn it around, have the handle pointing toward the person it’s going to. One note on passing items; if someone to your right or left has asked that an item be passed, you should not use the item as it goes around you; it needs to go to person who ask for it and then it goes back to people who have been skipped in that whole process. It’s called short stopping the items if while they are moving around, you decide you are going to use them or take something from a bread basket or take something from a serving plate while it’s on its way to the person, who has asked for it. Don’t do that, that’s rude. Coffee, let’s say you have added cream or sugar, you want to stir very silently, don’t make a lot of noise with your spoon. Never leave a spoon in a coffee or a tea cup in that manner. It’s going to be spilt, it’s going to be hit, it’s going to be spilt. Take the spoon out, always have the spoon in the liner under the cup.

Teabags, let’s talk about the fact you may say to the waiter, may I have tea instead of coffee. They may bring you an individual serving pot; they may bring you a teabag. If you have done to teabag, you’ve made tea in your own cup, never use the spoon and whine the teabag around the spoon and squeeze it. You don’t want to do that, very bad form. If you have a teabag, that does not have a string on it, it’s in there, its deep as long as you want it, use your spoon to remove the bag, put it on the liner.

Remember, anything like teabag, sugar packets, anything that is a separate piece of equipment or condiments or whatever, once you’ve used them, they always need to go on a saucer, on the rim of a plate, serving plate, bread plate whatever. They don’t go back on to the tablecloth.

Next we are going to talk about eating challenging foods. How to tackle difficult items?

Unit 15 Basic Dining Etiquette - Eating Difficult Foods （吃难吃食物的礼仪）

 Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with The Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette.

We are going to talk now about attacking some challenging foods. Often we will be served a dish that we are not comfortable with eating. We need to at least make an effort to see if we can get through that course. I like to say take cues from other people at the table especially your host or hostess. Wait, watch, look, see what are other people doing. You don’t have to be the first person who starts to eat that course. Find some cues from other people at the table. Let’s start by talking about spaghetti because that’s something that we’ve all had, it’s going to come up time and time again, how do we eat that without making a mess, without embarrassing ourselves what’s the right way to attack a bowl of spaghetti.

Three ways that you can eat spaghetti; you can eat spaghetti with just a fork, you can use the side of your fork, cut pieces of the spaghetti, pick it up in that fashion. You can roll spaghetti on the end of your fork and here I caution you to start with only two or three strings literally, no more than two or three strings. That’s how you will get a bite of spaghetti that is not going to be too large to get into your mouth. The third option is to ask for a spaghetti spoon. In many cases, especially Italian restaurants will have these handy. You might choose to roll the spaghetti, as we just talked about, in the bowl of the spoon in order to control it in a little bit easier fashion. Again, you are not going to start with more than two, three strings at the most; you can move it up, pull it up a little bit to separate those strings from the rest of the spaghetti in the plate. Keep rolling until you have a nice little bite of spaghetti on the end of your fork and then put that into your mouth. Those are the three options that you have for eating spaghetti.

If you are nervous at all, use the side of your fork, cut small bits, get those into your mouth. I also like to say if you are dining on very important occasion, a business function, sometime when you think that others are judging you, order foods that are easy to eat. You would probably not order any of the foods we are talking about in this segment.

Spaghetti has gone, now we are going to talk about a few other challenging foods. Let’s say you are served corn on the cob. Are we allowed to pick it up? Absolutely, it’s a food that’s meant to be a finger food. What you may not want to do when you care about your image and you want to eat as neatly as possible, you may not want to cover that with so much melted butter that its very drippy, when you are trying to eat it, but yes, indeed you do pick up corn on the cob, two hands, you eat it. You are not going to look like the old typewriter joke, but you are going to take a few bites at a time, put it down, eat some other things. Hands go immediately to the napkin, that’s in your lap, wipe your finger tips after you have picked corn on the cob or any food that you eat with your fingers. Let’s talk about shellfish. It’s a whole category of its own and many, many times fingers are involved in eating shellfish. If a caterer has done something very creative with a shrimp cocktail in this fashion, if the tail is left on the shrimp, you are permitted to pick it up. Tail on, fingers are okay. You may find that it is served with a cocktail fork on the plate, may come with a cocktail sauce, you get a spoon, you dip a little bit of the sauce into the middle and then each of these can be dipped into the sauce in that fashion. If it’s a larger shrimp, you will spear it with your fork, you can bite it two bites, leave it on your fork as you bite it, take that second bite. This is if the tail is off the shrimp, or you may choose to always hold the base of the glass like this so it doesn’t tip over, take the shrimp to the liner, which is the saucer under that cup, cut it with the side of the fork and eat it in that fashion. If that’s what you’ve chosen to do, I would still put the cocktail sauce in the main dish and you can dip in that fashion.

If you have ordered clams, oysters anything that comes in the half shell, the cocktail fork is going to be here on the right side of your place setting, it’s the only fork that isn’t placed to the left side of your place setting. Small three prongs, you’ll know that’s your cocktail fork. Again, your fingers come into play here because you are going to hold the shell that’s holding the oyster or the clam and if it’s been separated by the chef in the chicken, you just literally pick it up; put it in your mouth. If it hasn’t, then you may have to spear it, twist it, release the shellfish from the shell and then put it in your mouth. Normally, shellfish are eaten in one bite. Again, you may have to put some cocktail sauce here; you can dip it in that fashion. If you have a taste for lemon on any of these seafood dishes that we are going to be talking about, what you’ll want to do is from the common dish, you’ll pick up the lemon, spear it with your cocktail fork, squeeze it with your other hand and that keeps the juice from squirting other people as well. So, spear it, squeeze it, low and over the food that you want to have the lemon served with. Here is a real challenge, a fish course. This may or may not be something that you will encounter. Traditionally, fish course came immediately after the soup course. Fish course served whole, they were steamed, head and tail on, and this is our lucky day, the chef took the head off. I’ve always had a real knotty, anything that’s staring back at me. So, today, we have a fish with out of head, but the tail is there. If you’ve noticed, we have a knife that is slightly different shape, than our traditional dinner knife it has a point. A fish knife is held like a pencil, unlike the other knives in the utensils that you’ve been given. It’s held in that fashion and its shaped in that way so that you can use it to not only remove the skin from the fish, but you can use the point of that knife to cut down the backbone of the fish, pull the skin away, also cut the tail off, move the tail to the side and once the skin is removed, you may choose to put the knife down and eat with the fish fork only, if you’re eating in American fashion or the knife stays in your right hand and the bites of fish come to your mouth, using your left hand. But again, this knife is held like a pencil because you need it to separate skin from fish. You need it to slice down the backbone, you need it to remove that top fillet and you need it to remove bones. Even if the fish were not served whole, you may find a fish knife and fork is served, when you have a Salmon course or any fish that may have bones. That’s what the fork is for, the knife and the fork, are for the fish course.

Next well talk about toasting to end our meal.

Unit 16 Basic Dining Etiquette - Tips for the Toast （祝酒的礼仪）

Hello, I am Nancy Mitchell with the Etiquette Advocate and we are talking about dining etiquette. I would like to talk now about toasting. There are three types of toasts, which traditionally are part of the dining experience. There is something called the welcoming toast, which the host or hostess will propose as soon as guests come to the table. That’s a toast for the occasion for all of us who are present. We all sip that toast and participate as the remarks are being made. Then the service for dinner will proceed and dessert will be served. The host will again get up and at that point will make a toast to the guest of honor. In that case, he or she may stand, may ask us all to stand to recognize the guest of honor. What you do not what to do when you give a toast is to call attention to the toast by clinking the glass with a utensil. Either stand or with your voice, say would you join me in toasting the guest of honor. Then, we all raise our glasses and the host or hostess makes the remarks. We drink to that person or to the occasion that we are celebrating with that person. The person who is being toasted does not drink at that point.

Let’s say I am the guest of honor, we are celebrating my promotion in the workplace. While everyone is toasting me, I sit there, I smile, I may hold my glass, but I don’t take it to my lips to take a sip. Think about this for a moment, if everyone who is sitting there is singing happy birthday to me, I would not sing happy birthday to myself. So, I am not going to drink a toast in my honor. That’s something that brides and grooms need to be reminded about as well. After the toast in my honor, I may stand and reciprocate. I will thank our host or hostess for planning this lovely evening for me or for whatever the occasion. I will toast them and all of you who are with us here tonight. That’s called the reciprocal toast and then everyone will drink that toast. You may toast when you are in North America with water, with coffee, whatever the beverage is, if you don’t have wine or you don’t drink wine, you may toast with any other beverages that you have at the table. There are certain international cultures where that would be insulting to your host now to raise a glass of alcohol. Do some homework about international protocol. I would like to end the session by saying heres to each and every one of you and may you have successful timing experiences, cheers.

Practice

Argentina

Prior appointments are necessary

Argentine executives may put in a very long day. often lasting until 10:00 p.m.. An 8:00p.m. business meeting is not unusual

Business dinnersare popular and are usually held in restaurants: business lunches are uncommonoutside of Buenos Aires, since most people go home to eat lunch

Tender beef andred wine virtual national symbols. American beef and red wine compare poorly totheirs

Long meals andconversation is the norm. Crossing the knife and fork signal “I am finished”.Never pour wine back-handed: it’s considered impolite. When dining, keep your hands on the table, not in your lap

Gifts to beavoided include personal items such as ties and shirts, leather, and knives.High taxes on imported liquor make this a highly appreciated gift: the mostpopular are scotch and French champagne

Considering sending a gift to someone in Argentina, see gifts to Argentia

If the visitoris entertained in the Argentine home, he/she should arrange to send flowers or candy to his hostess. Bird-of-paradise flowers are highly prized

A guest should always wait for the host to sit down before sitting, and to open the door for him before leaving

Australia

Being punctualis critical.

Maintain goodeye contact during meetings and conversations.

A single, malepassenger using a taxi should sit in the front seat.

Gift giving isnot a common practice in business.

You may bring asmall gift of chocolate, wine or flowers if invited to someone's home.

When paying fora round of drinks, do not pick up the tab out of turn, and make sure to paywhen it is your turn.

Should youapproach a line/queue. go to the end/back and wait your turn.

Do not litter.

Brazil

Makeappointments at least two weeks in advance. Never try to make impromptu callsat business or government offices

Be prepared tocommit long term resources (both in time and money) toward establishing strongrelationships in Brazil. This is the key to business success

Some regionshave a casualness about both time and work. However San Paulo is not one ofthose, and in Rio casual refers to the personal and social events, notbusiness. In these two cities, business meetings tend to start on time

Never start intobusiness discussions before your host does. Business meetings normally beginwith casual 'chatting' first

Midday thenormal time for the main meal. A light meal is common at night, unlessentertaining formally

American coffeeis a mere shadow of Brazilian coffee. Expect to be served small cups of verystrong coffee

In Brazil,restaurant entertainment prevails versus at home

If entertainedin the home, it is polite to send flowers to the hostess the next day, with athank-you note

Giving a gift isnot required at a first business meeting: instead buy lunch or dinner

Purple flowersare extensively used at funerals, so be cautious when giving someone purpleflowers. Violets are OK to give

Toast: Saude orViva (Sah-OO-Day, VEE-va)

Tipping istypically 10% in Brazil

If you here theterm jeito - it refers to the idea that nothing is set in stone, that a goodattempt can break a rule

Canada

Be punctual formeetings and appointments, as promptness is valued. In French areas, time ismore relaxed. However, you will be expected to arrive at the appointed time,even if the French attending the meeting don't.

Always maintaina reserved demeanor, and follow good rules of etiquette. Traditions andgracious manners are part of the culture, even in more rural areas. If youtravel to different cities or areas, pay attention to local customs. By beingobservant, you will respect the pace and nuances of each area.

Do not eat whilewalking in public. Plan your time so you can stop in a cafe or restaurant toenjoy your snack.

Gifts are notroutinely given. If you do give a gift when you arrive or when you are leaving,make it a modest one. A lavish gift, though accepted, would be frowned upon.

Gifts are given to celebrate finalizing a negotiation, a contract, or a project. Gifts for theoffice, a nice bottle of wine or liquor would be appropriate. Considering agift for someone in Canada, see gifts to Canada.

Taking a businessassociate to a nice meal or an evening sporting event, play, or symphony isalways a nice gesture.

Invitations to private homes are rare. Occasionally, in the western provinces, you may beinvited to someone's home. If you are invited, you may take candy, flowers, orliquor to the host or hostess.

Wait for your host to start a business conversation during or following a meal.Traditionally, business is not discussed during dinner; however, this is slowlychanging.

Personal spaceand body movement or gestures differ between the English and the French provinces and cities. In English areas, body movement is minimal, there israrely touching other than handshakes, and personal space - how close someonestands - is about two feet. In French areas, people stand closer together,people will frequently touch, and gestures are more expressive.

Chile

Priorappointments are necessary

In business,punctuality respected. Meetings should start and end on time

Have businesscards printed with English on one side and Spanish on the other. Present cardsto everyone in a meeting except secretaries

Business entertaining generally is done at major hotels and restaurants

Light conversation is customary before business discussions

Don't serve winewith your left hand. Wines, especially white wines, are a national treasure

Proper tablemanners are important

Women haveadvanced in professions in Chile, more so than in most other Latin countries.However, they will be at a slight disadvantage because of the machismo ethnic that continues to exist

Gifts are not expected in business until the relationship is a close one

Chileans do notbargain in either stores or street markets. It is illegal to sell something andnot issue a receipt

Costa Rica

Costa Ricans are by far the most punctual people in Central America. North Americans areexpected to be on time for appointments

Since Costa Ricans allow themselves only a limited time for their midday break, everyone is expected to be on time for a business lunch

Most business entertaining takes place in the evening, since lunch isthe main meal of the day. Spouses are welcome at business dinners

Giftsfrequently exchanged on all kinds of special occasions

If you are invited for dinner to a home, bring flowers, chocolates,scotch, or wine. Do not bring calla lilies: they are associated with funerals

Have businesscards, proposals, and other material printed in both English and Spanish

Colombia

Schedule business appointments inadvance

Punctuality is relaxed: although as aforeigner you are expected to be on time

Have business cards printed in Englishon one side and the translation Spanish on the other. Present the card with theSpanish side facing your Colombian colleague

Business people prefer relaxedconversation before business

Lunch is the main meal of the day and apopular choice for a business meal

Typically, the person who has initiatedthe invitation will pay for a meal in a restaurant, although you may have tofight for the check even though you have issued the invitation

Let the host make a toast first, thenyou might wish to make one

Ecuador

Make appointments about two weeks in advance

Have business cards printed inEnglish on one side and the translation in Spanish on the other. Present thecard with the Spanish side facing your Ecuadorian colleague

Lunch is thecustomary time for the main meal and is theusual business meal. Ecuadorians are used to alcohol with lunch

Women should note that while it is acceptable to drinkwine, Ecuadorians are not accustomed to seeing a woman drink whiskey or other hard liquor

If a businesswoman wishes to pay for an Ecuadorian man's meal, arrangements should be made ahead oftime, otherwise the man will refuse to let her pay

If you are given a gift, be veryeffusive in your thanks

Fine wines and liquors make good gifts. Avoid lilies and marigolds, which are used at funerals

Let the host make the toast first, then you may wish to make one

Egypt

Space relationships among members of the same sex will be much closerthan North Americans and Europeans arecomfortable with. Egyptians will tend to stand close and moving away may be seen as a sign of aloofness. On the other hand, men and women stand farther apart from each other than is the custom in United States and Europe.

Try not to sit with your legs crossed.Showing the sole of your shoe is considered an insult to another person.

It is commonto smoke in public. Be considerate to others present and offer your cigarettes.

El Salvador

Make appointments a month in advance of your trip by telephone or by telex

Business is done only after a relationship has been established.Spend time forming a friendship before jumping into business discussions

It is rare to find women in upperlevels of business. A visitingbusiness woman should act professionally and convey that she is representingher company, rather than speaking for herself personally

Business isdiscussed in an office or over a meal. It isnot discussed in the home or around family. If you are invited to a Salvadoran home, this is purely a socialfunction

The main mealof the day is at noon. This will probably include black beans, tortillas or meat, and fruit andvegetables

Small gifts often exchanged. If you are invited to a Salvadoranhome, it is appropriate to bring a gift of candyor flowers

Avoid giving white flowers: they areassociated with funerals

France

Punctualityis treated very casually in France.

France is a highly stratified society,with strong definition and competition between classes.

The French handshake is brief, and is accompanied by a short span of eye contact.

Always shakehands when meeting someone, as well as when leaving. French handshakes are notas firm as in the United States.

The Frenchhave a great respect for privacy. Knock and wait before entering into a room.Additionally, do not "drop in" unannounced. Always give notice beforeyour arrival.

Business canbe conducted during any meal, but lunch is best.

Avoid drinking hard liquor before meals or smoking cigars between courses. The French believe this permeates the taste buds, compromising the taste of the meal.

Gift givingis left to the foreigner's discretion.

Good gifts to present include books or music, as they demonstrate interest in intellectual pursuits.

German

Germans are strongly individualistic.

The German thought process is extremely thorough, with each aspect of a project being examined in great detail. Thisprocess is often times very time-intensive. However, once the planning is over,a project will move very quickly and deadlines are expected to be honored.

Germans do not like surprises. Suddenchanges in business transactions, even if they may improve the outcome, areunwelcome.

German citizens do not need or expectto be complimented. In Germany, it is assumed that everything is satisfactory unless the person hears otherwise.

Punctuality is necessity in Germany.Arrive on time for every appointment, whether for business or social. Beinglate, even if it is only by a few minutes, is very insulting to a German executive.

In business situations, shake hands at both the beginning and the end ofa meeting. Additionally, a handshake may be accompanied with a slight bow.Reciprocating the nod is a good way to make a good impression, as failure to respondwith this nod/bow (especially a superior) may get you off to a bad start. Be sure to look directly into the person's eyes while shaking hands.

When being introduced to a woman, waitto see if she extends her hand.

Business is viewed as being very serious,and Germans do not appreciate humor in a business context.

In business meetings, age takesprecedence over youth. If you are in a group setting, the eldest person entersfirst.

Germans keep a larger personal space around them, approximately 6 inches more space than North Americans do. However, it is notunusual that when in line at a store cash register. Germans will crowd up veryclose to the person in front of them.

People that have worked together foryears still shake hands each morning as if it were the first time they met.

German men frequently great each otherwith Herr 'last name', even when they know each other verywell.

Germans are able to consume largequantities of beer in one evening, but public drunkenness is notacceptable It is best to know your limits, especially in Bavaria where two litersof beer is an ordinary evening. Pace yourself and eat plenty of food.

Typically, you do not wait to be seatedin German restaurants, and it is not uncommon to share atable with strangers. However, most Germans will think it odd if you try toinitiate a conversation with them beyond just establishing that the chairs areavailable.

Guatemala

Business people usually punctual

Male guests sit to the right of thehost; women to the left

Business breakfastsor lunches are preferred to dinners

The main meal of the day is taken atnoon, and will probably include black beans, tortillas or meat, and fruit and vegetables

Gifts are given in a business setting,but not necessarily on the initial visit. Easily breakable gifts may not be the best choice: Guatemala is in atectonically active zone, with frequent earthquakes and occasional volcanoes

Don't givewhite flowers: they are reserved for funerals

Hong Kong

The toast is an integral part of the culture in Hong Kong.

All countries have a standard toast however each country has a differentpronunciation for the word toast. Ganbei is the popular Chinesetoast. It means dry glass or bottoms up.

Everyone is expected to drink a toast.

The guest of honor makes the first toast.

Follow the lead of your host when dining.

Do not blow your nose at the table or inpublic.

Do not rub your chopstick together before dining. It implies that you have been given poor qualitychopsticks that may have splinters.

It is impolite to refuse to drink. Even if you do not drink, accept it and toast with your host.

Drinking helps to relax the host and is an importantpart of the relationship building phase in Chinese business culture.

Gift giving is a very important part of Chinese culture.

Bar hopping and karoke are standard means of entertainment.Be prepared to be taken out on the town almost every night duringyour stay in Hong Kong.

At close of trip, have a dinner for your host as show of respect.

India

Gifts are not opened in the presence of the giver. If you receive a wrapped gift, set it aside until the giver leaves.

Business lunches are preferred to dinners. Hindus do not eat beef and Muslims do not eatpork.

Indonesia

No physical contact between men and women is made in public, except a possible handshake.

Always rise when your host/hostess enters the room.

Leaving food on your plate signifies you are impolite, so eat all the food you are served.

Only useyour right hand for eating, when touching someone, or handling money/papers.

Talking is impolite while eating dinner. Conversation is reserved for before or after themeal.

Never show the soles of your feet/shoes or touch anything with your foot.

Never touch another person's head, this includes a child's head (such as a pat on the head).

Never eatwhile walking in public, or chew on a toothpick. Yawning in public isinappropriate (cover your mouth if you must yawn).

Remove yourhat and sunglasses when going indoors.

Gifts,though small, are frequently given.

Gifts arenot opened when given. This practice shows the recipient is gracious, notgreedy.

Italy

Italian history has played a crucial rolein the modern business world.

Some of theircontributions include banking, insurance, and double-entry bookkeeping.

"Time is money" is not a commonphrase in Italy.

Handshakes are common for both sexes, and may include grasping the arm with the other hand.

When invitedto someone's home, bringgift-wrapped chocolates, pastries, or flowers.Flowers must be given in even numbers, except for a dozen (12) or half-dozen(6), especially if roses.

If you bringwine as a gift, make sure that it is of excellentvintage, as many Italians are wine connoisseurs.

Avoid giving anything in a quantity of 17, as 17 is considered to be bad luck, or a doomed number.

Japan

The word fortoasting is kampai, pronounced 'kahm-pie'. When toasting the glass is never left unfilled. Drinking is an importantpart of Japanese culture. It is a way to relievebusiness stress.

Never pour adrink yourself; always allow someone else to do it for you.

Japaneserarely entertain in the home. If you are invited to the home of your Japanesehost, consider it a great honor and display a tremendous amount of appreciation.

If you areinvited to a social event, punctuality is not expected. It is the custom to be "fashionably late."

If you dotake your host out insist upon paying. The Japanese will refuse but insist.They will prefer that you choose a Western-style restaurant when entertain them.

Key phrases to learn are"itadakimasu" at the beginning of dinner, and"gochisou-sama-deshita" at the end. It is polite use these phrase andit will show you host that you have enjoyed the meal.

"Sumimasen" (excuse-me) is a very useful term to add toyour vocabulary along with the phrase "kekko desu" (I've had enough).

It isperfectly acceptable to slurp your noodles. Doing so will exhibit your enjoyment of your food. To do otherwise, indicates that your meal was not a pleasant one.

Do not openly display money. It is rare to see it given from person to person in Japan. It isimportant to use an envelope to pass money.

In Asia the number 14 is bad luck,because in Japanese it sounds like the word 'shuh-shuh', which sounds like theword for death.

Tipping is not expected.

Gift giving is very importantboth business and personal gifts

Style is tantamount. The gift itself is of little importance, the ceremony surrounding it is very important.

Always wrapgifts.Theselection of the wrapping paper is critical.Do not give anything wrapped in white asit symbolizes death. Donot use bright colors or bows to wrap the gift. It is better to have the hotel or the store wrap the gift to ensure that it is appropriate.

Do notsurprise the recipient with the gift. Give your host some warning during the evening that you intend to give them a present.

Give thegift with both hands and accept gifts with hands.

Generally,gifts will not be opened inyour presence. If your host insist that you open the gift do so gingerly. Theytake pride in gift wrapping, show that you appreciation the effort.

Do not give gifts in odd numberor the number four, as odd numbers are bad luck and four sounds like theword for death in Japanese.

Gifts shouldbe given at the end of a visit.

Do notadmire anything belonging to your host too closely. The Japanese strive toplease; you may be rewarded for your admiration.

The most popular gift giving occasions in Japan are oseibo,which falls at the end of the year and O-chugenwhich falls during the middle of the year.

Good gift ideas include topchoice beef, fruit and alcohol such as brandy, quality whiskey and Bourbon along with excellent wines. They also appreciate gifts fromhigh-end department stores like Saks and NeimanMarcus.

The Japanese frown on opendisplays of affection. They do not touch in public. It is highly inappropriate to touch someone of the opposite sex in public.

Mexico

Conversations take place at aclose physical distance. Stepping back may be regarded as unfriendly.

Mexican men are warm and friendly, and make a lot of physical contact. They often touch shoulders or hold another's arm. To withdraw from this touch is considered insulting.

Gifts are not required for a dinner guest, but will be appreciated. Goodchoices are candy, flowers (sent ahead of time), or local crafts from home.

When giving flowers: yellow - represent death, red - cast spells, and white - lift spells.

Do not give gifts made of silver, as itis associated with trinkets sold to tourists.

Tipping is appropriate for services provided. Wages are often so low that workers depend heavily ongratuities for their income.

Pay for store purchases by placing money in thecashier's hand, rather than on the counter.

New Zealand

Always beon time or early for all appointments. Punctuality is part of the culture."Fashionably late" is not an option in this country as most socialevents start on time.

Maintain areserved, formal demeanor, especially when first meeting someone. Take your lead to become more relaxed by following the behavior of your New Zealandhosts.

Boisterous behavior is always inappropriate, even when you are drinking. Pace yourself tomaintain the proper reserved and polite behavior.

Afternoon tea is between 3:00 - 4:00pm.

Tea is between 6:00 - 8:00pm, and an evening meal is served.

Supper is asnack served much later in the evening.

A tip maybe refused, as tipping is rare.

Entertainingis frequently done in a person's home. A small thank you gift of flowers,chocolate, or whiskey may be taken to the host and/or hostess.

Cover you rmouth if you must yawn, and do not chew gum or toothpicks in public.

Askpermission before you attempt to photograph someone.

Panama

When dining,the host usually sits at one end of the table with the guest of honor at the other end

Foreign businesswomen should always include spouses in invitations to business dinners

Gifts arenot normally exchanged when entertaining

Russia

Patienceis an extremely important virtue among Russians: punctuality is not.

Russians are known as great "sitters" during negotiations, this demonstrates their tremendous patience.

The U.S. S. R., was officially anatheist nation in the days of communism. Now, however, participation inreligion is increasing, with many citizenspracticing Protestantism, Islam, Russian Orthodoxy, and Judaism.

Thereis a Russian term meaning "connections" or "influences. It is extremely difficult to do business in Russia without help from a local. To helpwith this, gifts, money or other items are often a good idea when doing business in Russia.

If attending dinner at a family residence, it is appropriate to bring a gift, suchas a bottle of wine, dessert, or a bouquet of flowers.

Saudi Arabia

Try not to cross your legs when sitting. Never show the bottom of your feet.

The"thumbs up" gesture is offensive.

Gifts are not necessary, but appreciated. Avoid admiring an item too much, you host may feel obligated to give it to you. When offered a gift, it is impolite to refuse.

Women in Saudi Arabia are not permitted to drive vehicles.

Spain

The family is the most important thing to people in Spain.

Time is very relaxed. It is wise for foreigners to be punctual, but Spaniards do not put agreat emphasis on time themselves. The Spaniards often consider deadlines anobjective that will be met if possible, but do not become overly concerned if the deadline is not achieved.

Men who are close friends will often exchange a hug.

Women who are close friends usually meet and part with a small hug and a kiss on each cheek.

Negotiations are usually an extremely long and arduous task, so do notbe in a rush to close a deal in Spain.

Dining isusually associated with establishing business relationships in Spain, so beprepared for your business associate(s) to join you at any or all of your dailymeals.

Dinner is usually served after 9:00p.m, so you may want to take full advantage of the siesta and get in a nap

South Africa

Gift givingis not the norm in business.

Donot present gifts with the left hand.

Use either both hands or the right hand when giving and presenting gifts.

Gifts will be opened upon receipt.

Business meetings can be held over lunch or dinner in a good restaurant.

Meals at thehome of a white South African will include a barbecue by the pool-called abraaivleis (Afrikaans for roasted meat) or braai.

Taiwan

Meetface-to-face if possible.

Elders make the decisions.

Always include a senior executive in meetings.

Candor is not appreciated

Subtlety is the key.

Modify tone and volume as not to appear loud.

Do not visita home without an invitation.

Do not discard food from your mouth back to your plate or bowl.

Good topics during dinner include art. family, and Chinese sightseeing.

Gift givingis common practice in business - see gift giving section.

Good choices are items with your company logo on them for your first visit to Taiwan.

Give and receive gifts with both hands.

Gifts will not be opened in your presence.

Food is agood gift.

Avoid giving knives, scissors or cutting tools as they symbolize the cutting off offriendships.

United Arab Emirates

Avoid admiring an item to an excess, your host may feel obligated to give it to you. When offered a gift, itis impolite to refuse.

Often shoes are removed before entering a building. Follow the lead of your host.

Alcohol and pork are not consumed by those that observe the Muslimreligion.

The left hand is considered unclean andreserved for hygiene. Gesture and eat with theright hand. Do not point at another person.

Men walking hand in hand is a sign a friendship.

In the Muslim world. Friday is the dayof rest.

Do not cross your legs when sitting, showing the bottom of your shoe or foot is offensive.

The "thumbs up" gesture canalso be considered offensive by some.

Gifts are not necessary, but appreciated. If you do give a gift, it will be open inprivate.

Gifts to avoid giving include:alcohol, perfumescontaining alcohol –pork, pigskinproducts

personal items such as underwear –knives,toy dogs or gifts that picture dogs,imagesof nude or partially clad women (even in paintings or sculptures with artistic merit)

UnitedKingdom - Great Britain - England

When socializing after work hours, do not bring up the subject of work.

When diningout, it is not considered polite to toast those who are older than yourself.

United States

Gift giving is discouraged or limitedby many US companies. A gracious written note is always appropriate andacceptable.

If you do give a gift, it should notappear to be a bribe.

An invitation for a meal or a modestgift is usually acceptable.

If you are someplace with a line orqueue, go to the end and wait your turn.

Do not use or chew on a toothpick inpublic.

Many public places and private homes donot allow smoking. In some areas laws have been passed to prevent smoking inpublic places.

Venezuela

Unlike lunch,dinner is for socializing, not for business

When dining,wait until everyone is served before beginning to eat

Guests rarelysit at the head of the table

To indicate you have finished eating, place your utensils in parallel and diagonally acrossyour plate

Anappropriate gift for a man is something for the office - such as a good qualitypen. A women would appreciate the gift of an orchid - the nationalflower

Guests maybring or send flowers or candy to a hostess